Strange Memories

[crschmidt]

In second grade, a good friend of mine was running by me coming in from recess. For some reason, I stuck my foot out and tripped her. She scraped her face up on the asphalt pretty badly -- she had a scratched up face for weeks. I felt so horrible afterwards. I still have no idea why I did it. There was no explanation at the time, and no explanation now.

Why did I do it? Why would I want to hurt someone like that? I don't think I wanted to seem cool, or impress anyone. But I did it for a reason. I must have had some thought running through my head when I stuck my foot out.

I wonder if I was in the same situation today, if I would do it again. I hope I wouldn't -- especially not knowing that she would actually be hurt. I keep thinking that I didn't actually mean to hurt her, I just wanted to be playful and trip her for some reason, but that simply doesn't make sense.

It bothers me that I have memories of doing things, and no memory of why I did it. I seem to recall that even at the time I didn't know why I did it thoug, I just did. Thought that doesn't really make things any better.

Comments

[fvinnash.livejournal.com]

Remember, when we were younger (well, me moreso than you, you know, centuries ago), cartoons and slap-stick humor ruled the airways. People tripped all the time. People fell, got pies thrown in their faces, were hit in the face with a rake handle when they stepped on the rake itself, etc. There were *rarely* any reprocussions or injuries seen.

You likely did it, not thinking about it, because from what you'd seen, people falling was funny. Then you saw that people who fall actually get up injured, and realized that it's not quite as funny in real life.

Of course, that's just my theory.

from a long-time reader of yours

[melkiss.livejournal.com]

We all have that type of memories. It doesnt matter we dont recall the reasons why we did it. What is important is that we truly regret it now, that shows how much into the perfection path you have travelled and how much you have evolved.

[bkdelong.livejournal.com]

I also think that is the age when we test our ethical boundaries - what do we think about doing and what do we dare to actually do? Where is that line.....it may have been one of those moments.

[ilyzibyth.livejournal.com]

Hey, that HAPPENED to me in elementary school... and if it helps at all, I can't even remember who did it, and I could care less. :) Don't feel bad!

[pthalo]

I have memories like that too